It's official...

Last Friday, we had to turn in our letters of intent stating whether or not we were planning on coming back. We have the option to turn in a "maybe" letter and if you'd asked me a year ago, I would have said that I'd be turning in a "maybe" letter - just so that I'd have a job in case the job search isn't going well. I really disliked having to turn in my letter of intent so early; I was used to a system where you tell the office that you aren't coming back when you have a new job (obviously you'll let them know that you're searching but you have your job until you have found something new). That always seemed very supportive and just "nice" for the staff members and I always wished we had that system here. I get that it makes it tougher for the office - you may end up with a vacancy the week before opening and what do you do then? But it just seemed like the nice thing to do for your employees.

Well, I thought about and now I don't know anymore which system I prefer. I think having to make the decision whether or not you come back in January is scary and puts a lot of pressure on staff members. Even if you turn in that "maybe" letter, you'll be highly encouraged to make a decision once some of the placement conferences are over, so that the office knows how many staff members they can hire - and at that point, you still won't know yet if you get a new job or not. But otherwise, you may have these staff members sticking around, who really should have left a long time ago, just because the "perfect" job offer hasn't come around yet.

Surprisingly the decision to turn in a "no" letter was pretty easy. I know I'm job searching. I don't think I'd be able to give 100 percent in this job for another year - I just feel like it's time for something new. There's a part of me that's completely freakin' out and sees myself unemployed and kicked out off the country by May 15th (when my current contract ends), but usually I don't let that part of me take over. I didn't want to be a "maybe" - I'd still have to make the decision whether or not I'm coming back before I have a job offer, so it wouldn't be any easier in a few months. I'd rather just get this whole decision-making part over with. Now it's done. It's official. I will not be returning to my current position for next year.

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Keep your fingers crossed that I'll find a job or next year this blog will have to be called something like "With Broken Wings."

Haha.

Quick update from my job search process: I have finally revised my resume. I've sent it to my supervisor and another colleague and asked them to look over it. I've also looked at the ACPA Placement site and marked a few jobs. And I've looked at HigherEd Jobs and marked a few positions there. There's not a lot out there yet. And I'm still not sure what I'm looking for - Hall Director? Coordinator? Something outside of ResLife? There's so many things I could see myself doing...and then there's the fear of not getting a job if I shoot for some higher-level position or something outside of ResLife, so maybe just sticking with what I'm doing now but at another school would be fine...
I don't know.
People generally think that I'm very ambitious because I'm an overachiever and a workaholic and my job's basically my life. But really, I'm not. I don't want to be the youngest Director of Residence Life; I don't need to move up quickly. I like what I'm doing. I enjoy working with students. I just want a job; something I'm going to enjoy doing.